Neighbors Higashi-Jujo Yupi - vol.5 A "1-on-1" with 30 Residents

This is a column by Yupi, a resident of Neighbors Higashi-Jujo, who lives in Higashi-Jujo. This time we have a column by Yupi, a resident of Neighbors Higashi Jujo.

In a "shared place," things to talk about tend to be limited.

When I first came to Social Apartment, I was told that I should go on 1-on-1s with various people.

I know "1-on-1" sounds a bit business-like, but to put it simply, it means "going out for dinner with two people. It's just going out for dinner. That's all!

You might think, "Well, there are a lot of people living here, so why don't they just hang out together?" But I think that 1-on-1 is essential for building a deep relationship in a social apartment.

In social apartments, there are common areas that anyone can use, but the topics that can be discussed there are actually limited. Although we are not consciously aware of it, when we are in the common area, we can hear who is talking amicably with whom, what topics are being discussed, and what they are doing.

Then, for example, if someone asks, "Is anyone looking good lately?" I might answer, "No, I don't have anyone. You put a little bit of an oblique expression on your face. It is in a place of sharing that you can only talk about things that are "safe for anyone to hear.

A "secret place" where you can confide your true feelings

On the other hand, in a "secret place," you can talk about things that you " only want to confide in you.

When you are in the common area, it seems like everyone is openly sharing their love stories and past stories with you, but in the 1-on-1, it is interesting to hear a completely different angle.

When I see my friends who explain their backgrounds in an abbreviated way in the common area, I think to myself, "I have more passionate thoughts than that," so the topics we talk about are discarded depending on the location. I think it is because it is a closed place that we are able to have conversations and build relationships.

And I think that by making good use of both the "sharing space" and the "secret space" in social apartments, it is possible to build deep relationships!

First, we get a general picture of the person in the "place of sharing". By watching them interact with a third party, you can hypothesize that "this person is kind" or "we might hit it off," or you can talk about other things and become "I'd like to talk to him more.

Then, in order to get to know each other better, a "secret place" is necessary, but this "secret place" is something that happens by accident.

For example, you may talk until morning with someone you happen to meet in the common area late at night, or you may get excited while talking with others and say, "Let's talk over there. or "Let's talk over there. The " 1-on-1 Project," which I am implementing, is a shortcut to such contingencies.

What is the "1-on-1 Project"?

I just call it what I like to call it (laughs). By being open and saying, "I'm working on the 1-on-1 Project! By being open about it, we can eliminate skepticism that we are meeting in secret or that we are on a date. I think it's a great way to blow away any skepticism that you are meeting secretly or dating.

In fact, by being open about it, I have had people ask me to go on 1-on-1s with them, which makes it much easier for me to go on them. I invite them to a 1-on-1 in the common area, arrange a date, and we have lunch and drinks at a restaurant near the Social Apartment. That kind of thing.

People often ask me, "What do you talk about? I am often asked "What do you talk about? But in my case, I often delve into the past.

Why did you move to Social Apartment
・What kind of life have you led so far
・What are you doing now (work, hobbies, etc.)

I can talk for about 3 hours with this alone with plenty of time to spare.

I have gone on 1-on-1s with 30 people over a period of 4 months, and I feel that my relationships with everyone have deepened tremendously, as we have gotten to the point where we are on line every day, people have delivered food to me when I have a cold, and we have started working together.

I have never been very good in large groups, so the environment where I could talk in person and at length seemed to suit me.

I'm glad I did the 1on1. !!!!!

As a side note, because of my active involvement in the "1-on-1 Project," 1-on-1s became very popular at Neighbors Higashi Jujo for a while. It's nice to have an environment where everyone can do 1-on-1 casually. Also, by going with 30 people, I became very familiar with the stores in the neighborhood.

If you are feeling a bit out of place in a social apartment, try a 1-on-1 and go to one with me. And go for a 1-on-1 with me.

（Written by Yuki Ishikawa)